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JON ZAL

Your front-row seat to my nervous breakdown

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Parenthood

And the Academy Award for Best Parent in an Improv Performance While Operating an Automobile goes to …

January 13, 2009 8 Comments

Tuesday is my morning to chauffeur the lovely Miss Jayna to her nursery school, and doing so is always a bit of a crap shoot, because I never know which Jayna I’m going to get. Will it be the “Yay! School!” Jayna, or the “I DON’T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL! [weeping and crying and screaming]” Jayna?

This morning, it seemed to be the middle ground: she was neither psyched nor horrified by the prospect … and when your child is balancing between the realms of “Best Possible Outcome” and “Worst Possible Outcome,” ye must tread lightly and be on the lookout for potential landmines, for one wrong move and BOOM! And that explosion, brothers and sisters, will topple your little bundle of joy from the balance beam of ambiguity into a very clearly defined emotional realm, and you will wish you could put your fingers in your ears and curl up in a ball until The Screaming and The Crying have stopped.

And you definitely, definitely, de-fin-ite-ly do not want The Screaming and The Crying to take place as you attempt to part with your little bundle of joy during the preschool drop-off, because then you have yourself A Situation—or, worse yet, A Scene.

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Filed Under: Jayna, Parenthood

Nine Inch Wiggles

February 22, 2006 Leave a Comment

nin

See the guy in the middle up there with the big guns and the buzz cut? That’s Trent Reznor, the mastermind behind the industrial-rock juggernaut known as Nine Inch Nails.

I am quite fond of Mr. Reznor and his music. (This is what we in the writing business refer to as “an understatement.”)

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Filed Under: Music, Parenthood

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No, really: This job-search thing is like shooting fish in a barrel

Daddy Vader

If not for The Force, Darth Vader would have totally gotten his ass kicked, because that suit? Not very practical.

Turns out I have a bright future ahead of me ... in a field about which I know nothing

Man, this finding-a-new-job thing is going to be easier than I thought

Take Me Out to the Therapist… Take Me Out to the Shrink…

Gene Simmons on stage

Dear Gene Simmons of KISS, a.k.a. My Childhood Hero: I think there’s been a terrible misunderstanding. Either that, or you’re an overly sensitive dick.

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ABOUT ME

Jon Zal @ The Massachusetts State House, Boston

I was born in 1970, raised just outside of Boston, and now live near Philadelphia. As a child, I thought I was going to be…
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Hold my calls. 🤙🏻 Hold my calls. 🤙🏻
Hey now from the Jersey shore. 🤙🏻 Snooki say Hey now from the Jersey shore. 🤙🏻
Snooki says “Hi.”
When the @celtics & @nhlbruins both have a playoff When the @celtics & @nhlbruins both have a playoff game on the same night. 🙄 (Might put the @redsox on my iPhone after I post this.) #BostonStrong
The kind of Type-A madness that compels me to hang The kind of Type-A madness that compels me to hang 700 lights on a tree of this height and size is both a curse and a blessing. Love having this spectacle in my yard & spreading the holiday cheer. Enjoy! 🎄
We did it! The last time I ran an official 10K ra We did it!

The last time I ran an official 10K race, I was 18 and in Basic Training/Military Police School at Ft. McClellan, Alabama. Let's just say I'm a bit longer in the tooth and wider in the waist than I was then. 🥵

Proud to have legged it out with my boy yesterday to support @travismanionfoundation. Thanks to all who donated. (FYI: Donation link, which is in my IG bio, remains open through the end of the year.)

Official time: 55:28

#RunWithTheMarines
#MCM10K
The last time I visited the Marine Corps War Memor The last time I visited the Marine Corps War Memorial with my son, he was in utero. 😳 This Sunday, I’ll visit it with him again after we cross the finish line at the MCM 10K.

I’m running in honor of my late grandfather, Finn, a Marine who fought on Saipan, Tinian & Iwo Jima with the 4th Division during World War II.

My son and I are are also running to support the great work of the @travismanionfoundation. If you would be willing to help me reach my fundraising goal, I’d really appreciate it. Link to my fundraising page is in my bio. Thanks!
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