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JON ZAL

Your front-row seat to my nervous breakdown

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Beyond the #WomensMarch: Now the real work begins

January 21, 2017 3 Comments

Thank you. Thank you to everyone around the country and around the world who poured into the streets today and sent a clear message that we will not go quietly.

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Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: #TheResistance, Hope

An Open Letter of Apology to President Barack Obama

January 16, 2017 81 Comments

P042213PS-0783

Haven’t posted anything new since my piece on the January 6th insurrection. Needed a break. Planning to get back at it very soon, but in the meantime, I’m pinning this entry at the top of my homepage because it is the post of which I remain the most proud, and I’d rather it be the first thing people see/hear than my (justifiably) angry rant about the insurrection. -JZ, January 2023

Dear Mr. President,

Let me begin by saying the two words you deserve to hear cross the lips of every American citizen, whether they know it or not:

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Filed Under: Greatest Hits, Politics, Portfolio Tagged With: obama

It’s gonna be a loooooooong four years

December 1, 2016 6 Comments

Embed from Getty Images

Way to go, Red States! You sure showed us, huh? Wow. Rarely has such an epic act of unbridled stupidity, ignorance, selfishness, fear and hatred been carried out on such a massive scale. Well played!

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Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: Bush, Dubya, Trump

The post in which I take a deep breath and try to pull my shit together

November 11, 2016 5 Comments

The pool at Secrets Maroma Beach in Riviera Maya, Mexico
Pretending I’m in my Happy Place so that my head does not explode … (until I remember that this particular Happy Place might soon be on the other side of a giant wall).

Wow. Waaaaahhhhhow. The dude who wrote that previous post was pissed, huh? Daaaaaamn.

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Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: Trump

Well, look on the bright side: At least we … um … you know … uhhh … there’s always … hmmm … OK, I’ve got nothin’. We’re fucked.

November 10, 2016 8 Comments

You know that pivotal scene in “The Matrix” when a hairless Neo wakes up in a gel-filled pod and realizes that, up until that moment, he had absolutely no idea just how awful was the world around him, and just how misguided was he about the truth of his own existence? Yeah, that’s me, right now … minus the “hairless” part. (You’re welcome for that visual, though.)

I apologize in advance if none of the words I am about to type make a shred of sense, but I am deliriously sleep-deprived and deeply rattled by the recent discovery that I now exist in an alternate universe where an angry mob of millions just handed the nuclear codes to an abhorrent, vile, vulgar, uninformed, ill-tempered, bad-humored, intellectually challenged, racist, sexist, misogynistic, xenophobic, greedy, selfish, thin-skinned, petulant, pathetic little bully man-child because “Fuck you, you liberal-elites and all your reasonable, logical, tolerant, fact-based book-learnin’!”

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Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: Trump

Angry, post-Newtown rant (or: No, asshole face, the Second Amendment doesn’t give you the right to endanger all of us)

December 19, 2012 16 Comments

If you are someone who would ever consider designing this item, manufacturing this item, selling this item, or hanging this item on your Christmas tree, I have some bad news for you: You're a douche canoe.
If you are someone who would ever consider designing this item, manufacturing this item, selling this item, or hanging this item on your Christmas tree, I have some bad news for you: We’ve all decided that you’re a spectacular asshole.

We took the kids to the mall this past weekend for our annual family photo with Santa and, while standing in line, I saw hanging on an adjacent ornament vendor’s rack the patently offensive item shown above. (And I’m more than just a little ashamed to say that I didn’t, in that moment, have the presence of mind to gather them all up and hand them to the vendor while suggesting that he maybe throw them away.)

“But Jon, that’s obviously for hunting enthusiasts. Lighten up.”

Lighten up? Really? You want me to lighten up? Because here’s the thing: Fuck you; I’m all out of “Lighten up.”

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Filed Under: Politics Tagged With: Guns, NRA, Wayne LaPierre

A new beginning

January 20, 2009 Leave a Comment

Obama shirt
Old enough to remember when easily-taken selfies weren’t a thing.

I bought this shirt about a year ago, not long after President Obama (President Obama! Sweet Jumping Jesus H. Christ on a pogo stick, I love saying that!) won the Iowa Caucus. At the time, I still thought he was a bit of a long shot, but, after having started off the campaign season convinced that Hillary was my candidate, I suddenly found myself swept up in the excitement of Barack Obama’s candidacy. The man moved me — and still does. And, thankfully, he also moved a majority of the voting public last November.

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Filed Under: Politics

Patriotic duty

November 4, 2008 2 Comments

Veterans for Obama

This morning, I taped my “Veterans for Obama” sign to my front-door window. I did so to compensate for the fact that some asshole walked all the way up to the front of my house in broad daylight yesterday and stole my Obama yard sign. Fortunately, I’m pretty sure that the lack of signage in my front yard won’t have a substantial impact on Obama’s final vote tally tomorrow.

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Filed Under: Politics

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Hell hath no fury like white-male privilege threatened

Gene Simmons on stage

Dear Gene Simmons of KISS, a.k.a. My Childhood Hero: I think there’s been a terrible misunderstanding. Either that, or you’re an overly sensitive dick.

Daddy Vader

If not for The Force, Darth Vader would have totally gotten his ass kicked, because that suit? Not very practical.

Take Me Out to the Therapist… Take Me Out to the Shrink…

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Zombie Dinner Party … with your chef, Dr. Hannibal Lector

Turns out I have a bright future ahead of me ... in a field about which I know nothing

Man, this finding-a-new-job thing is going to be easier than I thought

An Open Letter of Apology to President Barack Obama

There must be a reckoning

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ABOUT ME

Jon Zal @ The Massachusetts State House, Boston

I was born in 1970, raised just outside of Boston, and now live near Philadelphia. As a child, I thought I was going to be…
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TWITTER

Jon Zal Follow 22,151 51,014

Husband, father, writer, podcaster, drummer 🥁, Army vet (M.P. K-9 handler), ex-music journalist. #BlackLivesMatter

jon_zal
jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
17 Mar 1636874896516034560

If “Dream On,” a track from their very first album, was the only song @Aerosmith ever recorded, and the only lyrics @IamStevenT ever wrote, they’d be the most legendary Boston band ever.

Now factor in the rest of their career. 🤯🤘🏻

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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
17 Jan 1615495856526094336

53.
Cheers.

Image for the Tweet beginning: 53. 
Cheers. Twitter feed image.
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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
16 Jan 1615067029861552128

Me, January 2022: “I’m gonna get in the best shape of my life!”

Me, January 2023: “This Dunkin’ muffin has blueberries in it, which contain antioxidants. I’m basically working out right now.”

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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
1 Jan 1609429806529277955

🥳🍾

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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
25 Dec 1607047694270484485

Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays, everyone. Wherever you are, whomever you’re with, I hope you’re feeling safe, warm & loved.

Image for the Tweet beginning: Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays, Twitter feed image.
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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
25 Dec 1606878215280250882

Am I the only one who feels compelled to leave on all the Christmas lights — indoors and out — all night long on Christmas Eve? 🎄

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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
24 Dec 1606714808526594054

Re-upping this gem for anyone who has, or has had, young children, and fell for this evil marketing ploy under the misguided belief it would actually get your kids to behave during the holiday season.

(Mine were 8 and 6 at the time; they're now 19 & 17.)

Image for twitter card

A letter to my children from The Elf on the Shelf

After the display the two of you put on this morning, it has become clear to me that my pixie-ish grin and ...

jonzal.com

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jon_zal avatar; Jon Zal @jon_zal ·
19 Dec 1604632518732533760

Sportsball is crazy today.

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The kind of Type-A madness that compels me to hang The kind of Type-A madness that compels me to hang 700 lights on a tree of this height and size is both a curse and a blessing. Love having this spectacle in my yard & spreading the holiday cheer. Enjoy! 🎄
We did it! The last time I ran an official 10K ra We did it!

The last time I ran an official 10K race, I was 18 and in Basic Training/Military Police School at Ft. McClellan, Alabama. Let's just say I'm a bit longer in the tooth and wider in the waist than I was then. 🥵

Proud to have legged it out with my boy yesterday to support @travismanionfoundation. Thanks to all who donated. (FYI: Donation link, which is in my IG bio, remains open through the end of the year.)

Official time: 55:28

#RunWithTheMarines
#MCM10K
The last time I visited the Marine Corps War Memor The last time I visited the Marine Corps War Memorial with my son, he was in utero. 😳 This Sunday, I’ll visit it with him again after we cross the finish line at the MCM 10K.

I’m running in honor of my late grandfather, Finn, a Marine who fought on Saipan, Tinian & Iwo Jima with the 4th Division during World War II.

My son and I are are also running to support the great work of the @travismanionfoundation. If you would be willing to help me reach my fundraising goal, I’d really appreciate it. Link to my fundraising page is in my bio. Thanks!
Took over the State House in Boston today with my Took over the State House in Boston today with my sis, @repjamiebelsito!
Insta vs Real Life: How I looked 20 minutes after Insta vs Real Life:

How I looked 20 minutes after finishing yesterday's 5K vs how I looked immediately after finishing yesterday's 5K. 🥵

Happy to have my boy home for the weekend ... except for the part where he passed me mid-run, did the Steve Rogers "On your left" thing & finished two minutes ahead of me. 😜

Him: 24:17
Me: 26:21

Glad we did it.

#911 #neverforget
“Would you like to return to the office?” Um “Would you like to return to the office?”

Um … nah, bruh … not so much. 🤷🏻‍♂️
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